I hope you all had great weekends!
Mine was full of fall activities which I will share later on in the week, including APPLE PICKING! My absolute favorite. It doesn’t feel like fall until I half-attempt to climb a tree in which I end up falling and being pricked (I had no idea apple trees had thorns…there really should be a warning label..or maybe I just need to gain some common sense? It’s up for debate).
It was the first weekend since moving with with M that we were able to simply enjoy ourselves and feel well, like we’re actually living together. Since moving in we both had been too busy to decorate or sit on the couch for a cuddle.
Which got me to thinking…Hey, LB, maybe you should blog about what you think the 411 of moving in with your significant other is?
So, my dear friends, I grant you…
1. Making the Menial Meaningful- the first thing I quickly realized about moving into our own apartment is that there is a lot of housework that needs to happen, aka laundry, dishes, ironing, general room cleaning...It can take a lot of time and sort of suck the romance straight up. M and I made sure to discuss who was going to do what so neither of us would feel any resent about one person doing all of the cleaning, etc. This past Saturday we made a game out of it. I blasted music and we danced around the apartment while doing our various work. It made it seem more fun and like we were doing something together instead of just cleaning.
2. Leave cute notes around. M and I are both really busy during the week with class, work, blogging, meetings, seeing friends, etc. Sometimes we leave at 8am and won't get home till 9pm. This can be a big bummer when one of us is home and the other is out. So, to make things a little better and to still feel each other's presence when we're out, M and I bought a chalkboard to hang in our kitchen. We leave each other random little notes. I never know when to expect one, so it really makes me feel special when there's one waiting! (Hint M Hint)
3. Leave the grumps at the door. I write about this in detail here. When M and I first moved in, I quickly realized when I had a bad day or was super tired I couldn't walk into MY room and shut the door. Instead, I had to learn how to not bring that home and take it out on M. I quickly realized talking about my day with M and explaining why I'm in a bad mood was much more helpful. Either that, or letting him know I need a little space and going on a run or for a cup of coffee on my own. This has helped us both to not create a toxic environment in our small apartment with our grumps.
4. Make a rule to snuggle. This past weekend was the first time M and I really got to cuddle on the couch and watch a silly TV show and WOW! did it make a difference. Studies show that even spending five minutes a day cuddling can help strengthen a relationship. Taking this time to simply enjoy being with M and not focus on work, homework, etc. has made all the difference in our transition of moving in together and has helped us actually feel like we live together. We've adopted the Sunday Cuddle Rule-aka we have to spend at least thirty minutes every Sunday being lazy and cuddling.
5. Be Mindful. One thing M and I are practicing (okay I'm practicing because I desperately need it) is being present for each other during meals and things. I'm always planning or thinking about what I have to do later, so I've taken to taking some deep breaths before dinner and focusing all of my attention on M and what he's telling me.